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Contest Entry - Fanfiction 
11th-Aug-2008 02:59 pm
yeah!, Master Crane-Ohey
Really nervous about putting this up.  No idea if I even like it or not.  Ohlawd, I'm ridiculous.  Beta person said it was fine, but still!  I'll just shut up now, hur. : ]

Title: When Evening Falls So Hard
Shuu/Kira, suggested platonic Kira-Gin, and subtle mentions of Blindy McBlindBlind even if that’s not a pairing~
Word Count:
Rating:PG for mild language, because I’m terribly boring.
I do not own or affiliate myself with anyone who does own rights to the intellectual property of BLEACH.  Characters are at legal age of consent.
This fic was inspired by episode 22 of PlantES as well as the Von Braun arc of the series, with one quote taken directly from Hoshino’s alter-ego.  I have a secret love for things written in the first person so, sorry if you don’t like it because of that.

The evening hum of crickets was a shuttering reminder of him and his departure of only a few weeks ago.  Funny, it had seemed longer than that, but perhaps that was because of my mindset, the responsibilities he left for me to handle admittedly overwhelming even for someone used to a day’s hard, honest work.  Well, not funny, but I guess humor is a better way to look at it all than with anger or depression as that didn’t seem to get people far and tripped them up on the daily odds and ends that still needed to be fulfilled.  There hadn’t been a pause since that day and in truth I had tried not to think about it up until now.

Because now, a cricket was staring at me.

It was just sitting there, not chirping along with the others on a blade of grass no more than a foot away from me.  Creepy, like it’s looking at me and only me with those big, blank eyes and...no, can’t think about that right now, I had to get back to my, his...whatever’s office to finish up the little stack of paperwork I had left till the last minute.  Unlike me, but Renji had wanted to talk and I couldn’t turn him down, especially since I had felt a grinding headache coming on before being called away from my solitary work.

Was about to ignore that damned insect too, actually turning my head back toward the path ahead of me until the thing bounced away, the movement drawing my eye back to it.  Despite myself, I watched it jump through the dark of night until it leads my attention to a color that didn’t quite fit in with the scheme; blonde.

Weird, the only person I know who had blonde hair was...

Smirking, even though I could easily question why Kira Izuru was laying down in the grass, at night, and so close to my division, but right now it seemed too petty as I just got the sudden urge to sit down next to him, ignore that all but forgotten work a little longer, and talk.  Just talk.  We had been friends for what felt like forever now so it wouldn’t seem strange if I just plopped myself next to him.  Which was just what I did but a moment later.

“Hey,” I said casually, sitting down next to him while leaning my weight into my hands, the grassy hill making that a little awkward.  At first, there’s no reply as if he were completely in his own little world, which makes me raise a brow about to lean over and wave a hand in his face before suddenly Kira jumps in his spot and looks over to me like his eyes might pop out, stuttering out,
“H-Hisagi-san!  I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there.  Are you-?”
“Calm down, Izuru,” I placed a hand on his shoulder, tense as it was, pushing him gently back to his spot even if he seemed determined to stay a bundle of nerves, “I just wanted to see what you were up to.  Haven’t seen you since-”
“Since they left?”
Blinking, a frown tugging at my smile, turning my attention to the ground in front of me as I just couldn’t stand looking at those liquid blue eyes that carried way too many feelings for me to handle all at once.
“Yeah, guess so,”   

Then we both just sort of go quiet, me not knowing what to say to even begin to comfort that and Kira still staring at me as if I would suddenly have all the answers.  Wish I did.  Though I didn’t, he seemed to get some comfort just for me being there, laying back down with his head resting on a hand.  A little smile comes back to my face, because, well, at least the friend I was hoping to be much more than that after all these years garnered comfort from my presence.  Maybe that was a selfish thought, but it was a nice one, too.

For a long while, what feels like hours even if it were only a few minutes, we lay there in silence and stare up at the stream of sparkling, white dots that cluster in the dark sky, a scene that always stirred me into deep thought despite my loathing for such things.  Maybe it was just human nature to look at the sky and wish for something, even if that something or someone, I should say, was right next to me though he felt a million miles away.
“You know, people...are like stars.  At first glance, they all seem very close together, but in reality, there is nothing but cold, dark space separating them.”
“...why would you say something like that, Hisagi-san?”
My surname and an honorific that I don’t deserve in such friendly company; See what I mean?  Distant...cold....
“Exactly my point,”
Shuffling over to his side to look over at me, he speaks low, words tinged with worry, “What do you mean by that?”
“Forget it.”
I sigh and smack my forehead at my stupidity, grinning inwardly just to lighten the suddenly tense mood.  Even if I meant to keep it internal, it feels rather appropriate that I keep my feelings close and open even if all of a sudden I feel like a hypocrite.  Stupid for trying to sound all deep and shit, too.  So much for trying to be philosophical...

Again, it got quiet and I just felt really uncomfortable with it.  Maybe I should just leave?  Obviously Kira didn’t want me around and I was probably just making whatever feelings he had worse an-

“Right there,”
He pointed to somewhere above the Soukyoku Hill, as if he knew that one spot like the back of his hand and was exact in his direction.  I raised a brow, about to open my mouth and ask what the hell he meant by that, figuring whatever it was to be the thing distracting him until he just sort of murmured,
“That’s where he was before he left.”
Squinting my eyes really hard, I can make out the mostly blurry shape of the hill until I realize how stupid it was for me to do that.  How stupid it was for Kira to still be obsessing over that bastard.  For some reason it makes me angry, something boiling up in my gut, biting my lip to hold back any crude remark that I knew I’d regret a moment later.  Just...why couldn’t I get through to him?  Tell him to stop and realize that yeah, ok, he’s gone, but someone else is here to help him through it, someone who was going through the same damn thing, and-and I didn’t have a clue how to convey that to him.  Tell him to trust me, like in the old days in the academy, and tell him that everything was going to be alright.  I just wanted to tell him that, shout at him to stop, but the words kept getting stuck in my throat!


“Shuuhei, I don’t understand,”
Wait, what?  Did I miss something?  Guess I spaced out too, because he was hugging his knees to his chest and looking over at me with the same eyes as before.  Can’t. Look.  Too. Damn. Cute. Yet. Sad. Urgh!
“Why did they leave?”
I didn’t know.  I was supposed to know, I was, am, Kira’s sempai.  He had called me that since the moment we met, being way too respectful and nice for his own good.  It’s what I loved about him even back then, but...I just couldn’t answer this one.
“I don’t know, ‘zuru,”
Couldn’t help but notice that the nickname made a small, little smile tug at his lips even if he was likely determined to keep that frown on.  I smile right back, a muffled chuckle passing my lips even if such light-heartedness didn’t feel entirely appropriate when such a tense mood hung about the two of us.  Little things like that had always made him laugh, back then, though something welled up inside of me to see him just smile now after all he went through on that day.  After all we went though on that day.


And then it hit me, like someone suddenly punched me in the gut or whatever.  This was going to sound dumb and corny, but Izuru was the type to appreciate anything idiotic that came out of my mouth, either way.
“About what I said before, I’m wrong.”  Well, that certainly piqued his interest enough to look at me a little more intently.
“You know how you can make pictures out of the stars if you connect them?” And I pointed to the sky to make my point, tracing lines between the dots at the one constellation I knew by heart, even if the name failed me, “Well, maybe people are like that too.  Maybe even though they may look really far apart they’re really connected, so even though they’re gone they’re actually still here.”
And then I paused.  Yeah, that was too corny, so now I was just waiting to be laughed at.  Yet, instead of that soft chuckle of his, Kira only nods, that smile a bit more permanent on his face and says softly,
“Kind of like us?”
Eh-, did he just?
Then I just feel his hand touch mine, tangling thin fingers with my own.  Looking over to him surprised, the blonde just leans over and kisses me on my cheek with those thin, soft lips I had wanted to feel for so long.  Stunned, stunned, with my mouth gaping open slightly like a retarded fish,  and incredibly turned on, though that was such a crude thought to have as I lose the tension in my face and just smiled back at Izuru, saying,

“Yeah, just like us.”




11th-Aug-2008 07:13 pm (UTC)
Your Shuuhei. He wins. He's the perfect balance between Mr. Responsible and Mr. Party Animal. It's hard to find a balance, in the end.

UWAH BRILLIANT!! HOW DARE YOU DISS YOURSELF FOR THIS?? IT'S SO GOOD!! And the stars (I like starry things) and the grass and the grasshopper... and yeah!

Subtle romance is the way to go. The way for win.

12th-Aug-2008 03:24 am (UTC)
<33333 ilu.

I like le stars, too and so many stars in PlantES and I blame that series for this fic in general. slfkhsdfhdfa. Yay 8D

Yay, I was hoping to find that balance. Whoot~ .O.
12th-Aug-2008 07:46 pm (UTC)
It was like wham bam good Shuuhei. Just like that xDD

Stars are happy.
12th-Aug-2008 12:02 am (UTC)
WHY ARE YOU NERVOUS?? This is good work ~ have more confidence in yourself!

You may have to be careful as there are a few inconsistencies in your tenses though (there are some times where you use present tense and other times where you use past tense) but generally you did nice work with this fic, so please don't think otherwise :)
12th-Aug-2008 02:50 am (UTC)
Yeah, That's why I was nervous, because when it comes to the technical part of writing I fail at life. :<

But thank you, anyway. <3
12th-Aug-2008 10:52 am (UTC)
I like your take on Shuuhei, so easy-going and funny. And I like the atmosphere of the entire fic, light and carefree but with a deeper meaning to it all.

“Yeah, just like us.”


Wipe that anxiety away! You have nothing to be nervous about! ♥
12th-Aug-2008 03:19 pm (UTC)
Thanks! I was aiming for that sort of mood, so I'm glad I achieved it. :3

I shall~ I think that all came from it being my first time writing Shuu/Kira and only second time actually finishing a fic. But I'm over it thankfully! :DD
12th-Aug-2008 07:21 pm (UTC)
AWWW OMG TIFF!! I happened to stumble by this fic...in a drunken haze of boredom. And it is so CUTE!! I'm really glad you're writing more for the bleach community, after that Kaku/Yumi fic you did. You really are a VARY talented writer! No joke, no joke. I liked the mood of this. Even though Kira was all malonchaly (sp?) the atmosphere was still calm and light bc of Shuu. It's awesome that you accomplished that, otherwise the fic would have been one big thing of depression! Anyhow, I am shutting up now. I just wanted you to know that I loved this xD

12th-Aug-2008 09:48 pm (UTC)

ilu moar~

You're so nice to me! Thank you so much! Yeeeeah, I was trying to avoid total angst, but it's a part of life so I sort of had to throw it in there somewhere [srsly, I think I would be depressed over half the crap they go through] or whatever. And hellz yeah to drunken hazes of boredom. They're the best kind of hazes~ 8D

12th-Aug-2008 10:42 pm (UTC)
Oooh that was awesome! I loved the image of Izuru and Shuu sitting next to each other, Izuru probably silently looking to his sempai to rescue him, this strong, handsome, together man... you conveyed this side of both of them well. And the part I loved most is Shuu's language when he's thinking... because he is a strange man like that (is thinking of the Goldens when he's been little less of a role model...).
Hahaha I hope my comment made sense!

Good luck in the contest.
12th-Aug-2008 11:16 pm (UTC)
It made plenty of sense and thank you! I seemed to have got through most of what I wanted to and that makes me happy! :]

The Goldens...? What's that? o_O

13th-Aug-2008 12:01 am (UTC)
Ooh, are you familiar with the anime? The Goldens are the omake often at the end of episodes. Shuu doesn't get a lot of jutsice in those... there have been Goldens that show his perverted and cheapskate side XD
The reason your fic made me think of them was because you showed his cool collected side, and at the same time his never the less punkish side XD
13th-Aug-2008 12:03 am (UTC)
Oooooh, the Shinigami Golden Illustrated whatever-the-hells! Yeah, I remember them and I thought that was what you meant, but I'm a lamer.

Ahaha, well, screw his uptight and responsible side! That's no fun to write about anyway. x3
26th-Aug-2008 06:09 pm (UTC)
Oh damn that was so adorable! You write a wonderful dorky Shuuhei and I loved that it was Kira in the end that made the first real move. :D
26th-Aug-2008 06:14 pm (UTC)
Thanks! I was just hoping it wouldn't seem like a bunch of waff or something, though trying to avoid pure angst or smut which is what a lot of fics in general are is hard, though I was going for something in the middle of waff and fluff. 8D

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